can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize