2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
