idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
So squirting runs in the family.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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