I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
We have so much sex to catch up on
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
