can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
