The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Well I just put wine in my tea
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
