So drunk its hurt
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
