Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
