In the future we'll all be gay
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
