I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
