I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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