Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
