Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
