it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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