Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
