i barfeds in our rink
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
is this the sara with the beer cane?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
