I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
