He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
