3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
