This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
