who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
