I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize