if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Randomize
