Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
