these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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