Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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