So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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