Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
