So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
He? As in you personified your dick?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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