i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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