Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
