Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Every concussion has its silver lining
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
