yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
COCAINE IS GR8
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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