Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
