I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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