I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize