Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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