that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize