Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
