is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
