so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize