Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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