I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
