So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
