The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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