Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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