i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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