Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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