did you get engaged???
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
