Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
