I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
