its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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